How I gave the bank $65 for a coffee

This is the story of how I paid the bank $65 for a cup of coffee and a breakfast bagel at Tim Hortons. It is a tale of great misfortune and woe.

See, I always set my credit card payments up on the computer. This involves an elaborate scheme whereby I keep my interest payments at a minimum for my credit line. (It actually isn't exceptionally elaborate at all, I just like to think I'm being clever). This means that when I set up the payments I don't only have to set up the payment for the credit card, I have to set up a short series of fund transfers between accounts. To ensure that this works to my benefit, I even make it so these transfers occur 24 hours apart, so that there is plenty of time to ensure there is enough money in the account.

Anyway, those are boring details.
The important thing to note is that I always have everything under control!

So it just happened that this last month this intricate money juggling (again, not actually intricate, but that makes me feel important) occurred at about the same time as a flyball tournament, and this is where things start to fall apart.

Saturday morning: I was running late, but I had no cash to pay for lunch and couldn't remember whether there was an ATM on site so I drove like a... a race car driver... a really fast one... to the bank and hit the drive through ATM. I only wanted $60, so I could have enough for two days of lunches, some raffle tickets, and dinner with the team Saturday night. But the ATM didn't offer $60 as an option.
Yes, I know you can punch in the exact amount you want, so long as it is divisible by 20, but what you seem to forget is that I was in a hurry! I had no time to punch in five whole keys on the little keypad! (you're going to say, "but, Monika, you only need to hit four keys" but you have forgotten the decimal, silly you. Though I understand I may in fact not know how to use an ATM and perhaps you don't need to put in the decimal when all you want is $60. I have been doing it this way for 100 years though, so I'm not changing now!) I was not sure that $40 would be enough for the weekend, because I wanted to order meat at dinner, I love meat. So I hit the button for $100. This was a mistake!

I collected my $100 and sped off to flyball, slowing down drastically upon entering Coaldale because I did not want to have to give the policeman my $100 for speeding. He was there, sitting by the side of the road as I suspected he would be.

Success, I arrived in time, possibly two minutes late, but no one noticed and crisis was averted. Surely my team could not do without my extra slow dog, my anti-ringer as my good friend Galen has dubbed him, and they would definitely fall apart without my elite box loading skills. (They don't know that I secretly panic every race because I can never figure out who is running second and I am always in constant fear that the little mini balls will fall out of the box and everyone will be sad :( ) All that means nothing though, because I was not late, and the peasants rejoiced "yay!".

I ate meat for dinner and saw that it was good.

Sunday: I woke up early. It was by accident, so I decided to leave early too because there was nothing on TV and if I laid down on the couch to watch nothing then I would have fallen asleep again and might never have made it.
I also thought it was awesome that I had enough time to drive the speed limit and stop at Tim Hortons for a coffee and a breakfast bagel. Even better, I had so much time that when I got to the tournament I was able to sit peacefully in my car and eat my bagel and drink my coffee without dogs barking at the air and people needing me for things. Don't get me wrong, I like to be needed, and I love helping.

However, this was my second mistake, and combined with the first mistake, it was fatal. I paid for my coffee and bagel with my debit card. I did this because Tim Hortons is from the prehistoric age and won't take credit card. I also wanted to save my cash, in case the price of lunch had drastically increased over night. Plus, I wanted just a few more raffle tickets.

About a week later I decided to check my bank accounts.

This is when I discovered that my credit card payment had not gone through.

Ridiculous! My credit card payment always goes through! I always make sure I have enough money in my account plus a little extra, to pay my credit card. In fact, I know for a fact I had just over $100 in my bank account over what I owed the credit... card... oh... $100. Just over.

I checked the balance of my bank account, and I compared it to my credit card bill. I was short the price of a coffee and a bagel at Tim Hortons.

Curse you Tim Hortons!

That is the story of how I had to pay the bank $65 in interest for a bagel and a coffee.

The end.

PS: Can you spot the comma splice? (hint: there is probably not just one)

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